One year.

1970something

Christmas 1974 and the Baby Alive dolls Donna and I wanted so badly.  If you think about it, those things were just gross!

Easter in either '91.  Casey loved "Cat" and wanted you to ride with her.

Christmas 1996, Austin loved your whiskers.

Christmas 2007.  Logan made himself at home in your lap.

Christmas 2008, the last picture I took of you.

It's funny how we remember certain things we did on certain dates.  I remember posting on this very blog exactly one year ago today, and it remeber it being a very short post; that was all I could manage.  One year ago I lost my Daddy to small cell carcinoma lung cancer.  He had valiantly fought the disease for 5 years, but cancer doesn't fight fair and he lost. He would not have lost a fair fight.

Daddy, I miss you.  I think of you every time Austin wants to go fishing.  I know how you would have enjoyed sitting on a river bank or in a John boat with him.  You would laugh at his stories...he always has one.  You would get a kick out of Logan, too.  You would shake your head and say the same thing we do, "where did he come up with that?"  You would get yourselves in trouble by telling him to do something ornery...and he would do it.   You would be amazed at the beautiful young woman your first grandchild has grown to be...and how much she looks and acts like her mother.  You always said she was stubborn...just like her mother, then you would laugh. 

I treasure all the fun times, the camping trips, trips to Rush, and the long nights at rodeo arenas when you would draw up in one of the last go's...maybe it was because I went to the rodeo dance while the rest of you waited to rope? 

I miss you, but I know I will see you again in Heaven.  You told me that, and that is one of the most treasured memories I have.

I have to go to bed now.  I have an awful headache from crying, and I know you would laugh if you could see me, and tell me there was no reason for tears.

A day of good news

Whoever said prayers don't make a difference are WRONG! Prayers are working, so please keep praying. By the time I left the hospital tonight Daddy was able to squeeze your hand with his left hand, he was able to swallow some soft foods (Casey & Shelby...my DD and neice...went to Wendy's and got him a Frosty and he was able to get about 1/4 of it down. He is talking much better and you can understand most of what he is saying. He is, however, very stubborn and wants out of there! He keeps trying to get out of bed, and the nurse had to set the bed alarm. He isn't as strong as he thinks he is and got a little annoyed with us when we told him he had to wait on a physical therapist.

He is now on Morphine for pain, but the other pain med that was causing him hallucinations and nightmares is gone, we can handle Morphine for how ever long he has left. His heart rate has finally stablized and is in normal range, so he is out of danger of a heart attack, too. Tonight I rubbed his back because he is very tired of lying in bed, and tomorrow I'm taking the good muscle rub (Sombra) with me and will give him another back massage. He was resting when we left, the pain meds had kicked in and he had a warm blanket.

He will remian in the hospital for at least a couple more days, after that he will be moved to a transition hospice care at Hospice House of the Ozarks. Don't panic, his stay is only planned for 2-3 weeks where he will recieve 24/7 nursing care and my step-mom will be able to stay in the room with him; they will have a bed for her. When he leaves the hospice house and gets to come home, he will have a hospice care nurse to stay with him during the day. He has to have these nurses because he is on a controlled drug now and everything has to be carefully monitored. He did tell me this afternoon that some men from their church came to see him and had prayer time with him, which really made his day. I have a sub coming in for me tomorrow so I can stay with him while Tammy & Twyla (stepsister & step-mom) go home and get some much needed rest. I may stay with him tomorrow night, we will see.

Thank you for all your prayers, we are feeling them and know that is why he is making such remarkable strides in such a short time. I know God is on His throne and His way is the best way. I also know, that no matter what may lie ahead, He will take care of us if we remember to lean on Him.

**** On a side note, I will be taking my computer with me to the hospital, but I don't know if I can get a wireless service there, we will see. If not, I should be able to get lots of writing done.